Austin, TX. Friday afternoon Todd Bertram, a life long resident of the capital city, succeeded in his life long efforts to achieve invisibility. Inspired by comic books at an early age, and less innocent applications in his teenage years, Mr. Bertram has spent much of his adult life perfecting a chemical compound that would render the human body entirely invisible. Mr. Bertram would often spend long hours in his garage laboratory, experimenting and railing against the close minded scientific community that he claimed failed to recognize his brilliance. When asked if the chemicals or peculiar equipment ever caused any community disturbances his neighbors had this to say: “Who’s that again?”
Early in the week, Mr. Bertram sent invitations to all the local media outlets, including a number of bloggers and Twitter celebrities, indicating that he would be holding a press conference for his public unveiling of his new product, InvisiGoo. Refreshments were served in Mr. Betram’s living room before the three reporters in attendance were brought into the backyard for a demonstration. After applying the viscous gel to his skin Mr. Bertram remarked, “As my final visible act, I would like to give a one finger salute to all the haters that doubted me for all these years.”
“Yeah, he’s always been a bit of an ass,” commented long time friend Jamie Slovak. At that time Mr. Betram indeed faded from view, to the amazement of all five people in attendance. Mr. Betram promptly fell from his makeshift stage, apparently no longer able to see as his invisibility had rendered his retina’s useless.
“I suppose I should have anticipated that,” Mr. Betram said of his sudden blindness, after he’d secured ice for his sprained ankle. Mr. Betram’s current plans include learning brail and filing for disability.