This one came from a writing prompt, so don’t blame me if you think the premise is a bit daffy. At the very least it should be good for a chuckle.
“So let me get this straight, you’re a were-shark?” Jenny asked, her face twisting with the question. She quickly picked up her cup of coffee and took a sip to hide the smirk that was tugging at her lips.
“I didn’t say that,” Tommy said, his voice low. He crossed his arms and lowered his gaze to the tacky vinyl table-cloth that covered the diner table between them. “I said my mother was a shark.” Jenny made a noise, choking on the hot java as it caught in her throat. She wiped at the corner of her lip and struggled to stay composed.
“But clearly you aren’t a shark, I mean look at you: head, hands, feet, fingers. You seem to be all there.”
“Yes, well my Dad was a human.”
“And he bonked a shark? That’s kinda gross,” she said and his cheeks flushed involuntarily as his eyes continued to look anywhere but at her. “I mean, how does something like that even happen? Was he just running around getting it from every fish he could, or was your mom somehow special?” Tommy uncrossed his arms, recrossed them, and then shifted in his seat.
“Did you ask your parents this kind of thing? It’s not really something I’ve ever gotten into with either of them,” he said, his cheeks still rosy.
“Well, no, but both of my parents belong to the same species. Hell, the more I think about it, the more fascinated and horrified I become. I mean, what are the mechanics of something like that? Was he wearing scuba gear? Did they cuddle afterward?”
“You’re insane,” Tommy said, looking up finally, his eyes narrowed and jaw tensed. “Do you really think this is the kind of thing that I want to talk about?” Jenny laughed and then she settled back into the vinyl booth seat and shrugged.
“Sorry, its just a bit much to take in. I mean, you might as well have told me your Dad was a wizard or something.” At this Tommy’s expression went blank and his eyes shifted to the side. “No, don’t even play like that you asshole,” Jenny said, clapping her palms down on the table hard enough to make the spoon from her coffee jump. He smirked, one side of his mouth twisting up in a lopsided grin and this time Jenny blushed. For the first time she noticed how sharp his teeth looked, and wondered if that was just the power of suggestion or if there was any kind of truth to his crazy tale. “Ok, so you’re a son of a shark that walks like a man, and you spend your day working retail? Seems kind of anti-climactic to me. I mean, don’t you have special powers or something?”
“What like some fish based superhero? I don’t look too great in orange,” Tommy said, reaching out and stirring his own cup of coffee.
“Maybe law school?” Jenny said, a smile spreading across her face once more.
“Yeah, I guess I might fit in great there,” Tommy said, chuckling as he did.